In general, I am a big fan of bagels. There’s something convenient about having such a densely packed and portable source of carbohydrate. And they’re versatile: there’s the classic “spread some stuff on it” approach, and there’s the bagel sandwich; one can go sweet or savory depending on what the situation calls for. The only problem I have with bagels is that sometimes the stuff in the middle squeezes out the sides or falls through the hole in the middle. On sliced bread, this is not so much of a problem because there is more surface area on which to put the stuff in the middle (so one doesn’t have to stack it as high), and usually there is no hole in the middle.

Em buys lower-calorie “bagel thins”, but I must have the full-size bagels – and good ones – at least the ones from the bakery department in the grocery store. Maybe it’s worth upping our game and going to an actual bakery to make a separate trip… There’s a coffee shop right next to Em’s workplace, and every so often, they drop off a bag full of old bagels. They disappear in about two minutes. Once I grabbed one of those – it was pretty old and a bit petrified, but I was so excited to eat a bagel. I bit into it with such vigor that I had a sore tooth for the next several days. I had to chew on the opposite side of my mouth. My dentist still asks me about whether the problem has come back. Fortunately, it hasn’t in the past several months.

I had heard that New York bagels stand apart from bagels made anywhere else. Some would claim that bagels originated in New York, but according to Wikipedia, they were first created in Poland. Anyhow, I wanted to experience a New York bagel or two to see if they lived up to the hype.

My first stop was Bagelsmith – I didn’t seek this one out, but it was on the way.

I don’t really get the point of this – insulation? But this is what they did to the entrance.

Bagelsmith’s retro ceiling fan

Vegan bagel sandwich with avocado, lemon juice, sprouts, onion, and cucumber

It was all right. Honestly, the bagel didn’t seem any different from garden variety bagels from any bakery elsewhere in the world. The sandwich was pretty good, aside from the two lemon seeds that I found and probably more that I ate without realizing it. At this point, I thought the hype about New York bagels was B.S. just like I suspect of the hype about New York itself, which kind of reminds me of the hype about Paris.

The next day, Shawn brought back bagels for breakfast. He made a point to go to a better place (not sure where).

Sesame bagel with chive cream cheese

This one was better, as evidenced by the fact that I ate half of it before I could take the picture. Shawn said that with a good bagel, to toast it is to bastardize it. Also, my former roommate Josh, whose parents once owned a bagel shop told me that a good bagel should have a bit of crunch on the outside but be soft on the inside. This bagel met Josh’s guideline, and I wouldn’t have thought of toasting it because it was crunchy enough on its own. This gave some credibility to the New York bagel hype.

According to Shawn, the pinnacle is Ess-a-Bagel. I didn’t get there this time – so maybe next trip. Shawn described their bagels as “life-changing”.

Also, Shawn and Natalie showed me this mini documentary from the Brooklyn Public Libarary:

It introduces a pretty novel idea: “You know what bagels are used for? You got a flat. You got old bagels in your car. You fix your flat.” Who knew? This inspired another slightly more practical idea for traveling by bike with bagels.

The Bagel Bicycle (TM) by Mike Eng

With the boiling step (or the mass-production equivalent of steaming), that would cause rust problems with a steel frame, but hey, it could work with aluminum! Disregard the fact that there’s a basket on the front of that bike. Or heck, you could fill that basket with bagels and then also put about 10 bagels around the top tube of the frame as well and then eat them off of your bike as if it were a rideable candy necklace. It’s a great idea for bike touring! Not sure why no one has thought of this – I searched for “bagel bicycle” but didn’t find anything relevant, so I had to Photoshop it myself.